I have already written about how we can seek attention in a good way. However, I really only addressed certain circumstances, like if a group of friends ignore you. Girls can also really struggle with gaining the attention of a guy. You want to pay attention to the points that I discussed in part 1 of this topic. They will definitely affect the type of guy that is attracted to you.
If you get anything out of this, I want you to remember this: Guard your body. It deserves to be taken care of and respected. In Jenna Lucado’s novel Redefining Beautiful she gives a beauty tip that I think all girls should mind: “Modest is hottest.” Don’t you agree? Okay, I know that it might sound like we should be dressing in granny clothes, but that’s not what it means at all!
Lucado also writes “what we wear says a lot about how we expect to be treated.” This is where the “Modest is hottest” thing comes into play. You can still follow all the styles that are in today, but you can also make these styles your own. Don’t show off your body! Cover up everything because it definitely reveals something about your character: that you deserve to be respected by everyone.
Again, Lucado makes a great point with this: “If a guy notices that a girl is wearing clothes that tease his eyes, he will more than likely think she is a girl who is easy and flirty, and he may treat her with less respect. But if we keep the private places private, guys will think we are a little bit more mysterious. They won’t assume that you are someone to take advantage of.”
I love this! I dress in a way that hides everything, and I don’t get unwanted attention from boys because of it. You may think that if you don’t show yourself off a little bit, you aren’t going to ever attract a guy. Here’s a little secret that you need to know: If the guy that you attract only cares about your body, he isn’t worth your time. Every girl deserves someone who loves them for who they are, someone who looks at their heart before they focus on your body.
Gain the respect that you deserve from other people, particularly males, by respecting your body. Dress modestly. You may not get a lot of attention from guys at first, but one day you’re going to meet someone who is attracted to you because of the way you treat your body and because of your heart.
(Quotes are from page 130 in Jenna Lucado’s book Redefining Beautiful.)
Everyone likes to be noticed. It’s just a fact of life. When people ignore you, you feel invisible, like you don’t matter. Here’s the thing: You do matter. Someone is bound to notice your strengths eventually. You just have to wait for the right person to come along.
When people give you the silent treatment, you can react in two different ways: You could change your personality and become an attention-seeker or you could just be yourself and do your own thing. The bad decision would be to become an attention-seeker.
You may wonder why seeking attention isn’t a great thing to do. Don’t get me wrong, there isn’t anything wrong with wanting to get someone’s attention. For example, if you have a crush on a super handsome guy, you’re definitely going to want him to notice you. The way that you seek attention is going to affect how people respond to you.
If you try to push your way into someone’s life, you come across as overpowering. They are going to really try to ignore you because you are getting weird. They aren’t going to want to spend time with you and you’re probably going to get hurt even worse than you were before because of this rejection.
If you try to gain attention by quietly going about your business and by doing things to help the people you want to hang out with, they are going to start to notice you. This type of attention-seeking is okay because you aren’t making yourself susceptible to major rejection. If a group of people still ignores you, you should probably go and hang out with another group of people. You don’t want to get hurt, and you don’t want to start getting pushy.
In a book titled Be Who You Want to Be, the author, Karen Casey, makes a great point about attention seeking. She writes, “It’s okay to want attention. Everyone likes it when people notice them. But there are good ways and bad ways to get attention. Bad ways get people’s attention at other people’s expense, like by interrupting them or making jokes about them or teasing them.”
This point is so great because it describes how attention-seeking can have negative impact on your character. If you are rude in order to get someone’s attention, people aren’t going to want to hang out with you.
The message is this: If you want to be a nice person that people like, you have to gain attention in good ways. After all, you don’t want to be known as a rude girl.
(Quotes are from page 53 of Karen Casey’s book Be Who You Want to Be.)